A depressing poem

Feeling down

Why this Now? 

Don’t know what it is 

Don’t know if I can handle it.

How can I feel so lonely 

When I’m surrounded by people that love me

Or so I think 

This feeling better be over quick. 

How can it be

Maybe they don’t love or appreciate me 

Put downs, 

I enter and see frowns

No greetings of peace, 

Is this how things should be? 

I don’t have the energy 

To put it simply

I cannot be bothered 

Trying to make you happy, almost impossible. 

So forget me, 

Walk away quickly

I don’t want to feel this way 

Maybe I’m feeling edgy cause it’s late  

Maybe you should just leave

Before things get harder

There is no more laughter.

Not many people will believe, 

How harsh you’ve been to me. 

You’re so nice to the others, 

Why am I the only one that doesn’t cut it

I’ve shown you so much goodness 

You kick me to the kerb as if I’m useless

Stranded outside now dear 

How did we get here 

Now things are a mess 

As usual, I’m to blame for this. 

Blinded

We feel sorry for the blind,

Yet we cannot see.
They have no sight,
But we are the ones blinded from this worlds’ beauty.

We sympathise with those who have no sense of hearing.
But we are reminded over and over again, and we do nothing.
How about those who have no speech,
Are we grateful for the blessings we reap?

Don’t feel sorry for the one who doesn’t have one of these abilities
They cannot see or hear the injustice that we commit daily.

It is true that we can be deaf, dumb and blind
Even though we see, hear and speak.

“Deaf, dumb and blind – so they will not return [to the right path].” -Baqarah v18

“The lightning almost snatches away their sight. Every time it lights [the way] for them, they walk therein; but when darkness comes over them, they stand [still]. And if Allah had willed, He could have taken away their hearing and their sight. Indeed, Allah is over all things competent.” -Baqarah v20

Hospital bed

Seeing you like this,

So hard. 

I’m struggling to write, 

No matter how much I try

I cannot put into words, 

How much it hurts. 

I can only pray that things get better, 

But it’ll take time, patience and never 

To lose hope.


If my Lord, the all Powerful, Al-Jabbar

Can send his messenger far 

From Masjid Al Haram to Masjid Al Aqsa 

Through the heavens and back to Makkah

Then He can surely cure you if He wills. 

And if my Lord the Most Merciful, 

Can grant His servant Zakariah 

Whose bones were weak and frail

Grant him a child when he asked for a successor 

Even though his wife was barren, 

By the Will of my Lord, anything can happen. 

And how about when our mother Maryam

Had a baby without a man 

Her son became one of the most noble 

Prophets to walk this globe.

So do not despair 

Allah will take care of your affairs.

And for Musa, He split the sea in two, 

If only you knew

Maybe your health will be restored

And it is easy for My Lord 

To simply say “Be” and it is.

There is nothing He cannot fix.

~Seeing my grandpa in the hospital the way he is, he’s not himself. He’s usually so strong and tough. Now he’s weak, sore, and struggles to move. He usually has a very loud voice, and now we can barely hear him due the cords damaging his insides. He’s hallucinating due to the stroke, explaining events that never took place. The pain to see him like that is one thing, but to see my grandmother upset and hurting is a whole nother story. It just reminds you how temporary this life is. SubhanAllah. Alhamdulillah for everything.

Please keep him in your duas as well as all the other sick people in the hospital and at home. May Allah swt heal all the sick and grant their families Sabrine jameel. Ameen.

Feeling abandoned

And just like that, you have left us again

Year after year, out into the wilderness you descend,
Before we could taste the sweetness of your presence.
I pray that our deeds are of acceptance.
How dear you are to me,
Seeing you again, I have no guarantee.
Many of us reach the height of worship when you’re around,
Only to fall back to our bad habits once shawwal comes round.

The fastness of this month should be a reminder to you and I,
About how fast this life goes by.
Before you know it, we’ll be standing in front of our Lord
Answering questions about this life we adored.
How were our daily prayers,
Our speech and our manners.
Were we kind, generous and helpful.
Or did we make life difficult for people.
How did we spend our wealth and youth.
Did we spend our time in worship or at play.
These are things that will be asked on that day.
Are we still not ready to make a change?

#ImissRamadan

The Qur’an

People sometimes ask the inevitable question,

“Why do you read a book that requires so much comprehension?”
“If you do not understand what you’re reading
How do you expect to find in it healing?”

See, this book is the one that can turn the hearts of many,
Regardless of how much envy
You may have originally had
You cannot escape the plans of God, Al-Ahad.

When I recite the verses of this book,
I cannot overlook
The fact that God is speaking to me personally
How could I read it carelessly?

In this Qur’an there is a remedy,
For every pain and every calamity.
If you reflect upon its meanings,
You will find so many blessings.

It is out of God’s love and mercy,
That he sent Prophets before you and me,
Whose stories are lessons for every human being,
Not matter what hardships you might be facing.

Read this book so that it may heal
All this pain that seems surreal,
Recite in the name of your Lord,
So that you return to Him with much reward.

Names of Allah

Everyone is searching for love.
Forgetting the One who is above.
Al-Wadud is the Most Loving,
Al-Malik, sovereign of the day of reckoning.

We try to fill this void in our heart
That can only be filled with the remembrance of Allah.
If only we would seek forgiveness in Al-Ghaffar,
And trust the Most Powerful, Al-Qahhar.

Some of us search for happiness,
Hoping it will fill our emptiness.
All we need to do is turn to As-Salam
the Source of Peace, the Lord of Abraham.

We seek answers in those who are just like us,
And we fail to turn to the One, the Only, Al-Ahad.
He is also Ar-Razzaq, the Ever Providing
Ask from Him when you feel your world colliding

How do I expect to receive His Infinite Mercy
When I struggle to forgive those who hurt me
My Lord is Ar-Rahman, Ar-Raheem.
How could I not trust the All Knowing, Al-Alim?

Al-Khaliq knows the nature of His creation,
Should we not worship Him in appreciation
For granting us security, Al-Mu’min
The Guardian, the Protector, Al-Muhaymin

Should we not be grateful to the Bestower, Al-Wahhab?
He knows all that we have.
And despite seeing all that we do,
If you want to be pardoned, just ask Al-Afuww.

Turn to Him

If the angel of death at this instant
Took your soul into the distance
Would you be happy with the life you led
Or would you want to change it instead?

Would you be happy with the decisions you made?
Or do your decisions make you afraid
Of the questioning that will happen in your grave?
Now you wish you had behaved.

Why do we waste so much time
Putting effort into a life that is only a sign
A test for you and me
My friend, you cannot flee
From the angel of death
Was it worth giving in to our nafs?

We say we will start tomorrow
But that day may never show
None of us are guaranteed the next second
Yet we plan for the next decade and,
Do you not think that you will die?
It is the only thing guaranteed in this life.

So whatever is making you sin
Remove from your life this thing
It is not worth being the reason
For your hereafter to be in prison

Turn to the Most Merciful, the Most Forgiving
For only He can add quality to this life you’re living. 

Wall

She built a wall. 

She wouldn’t let anyone knock them down, not at all.

She thought this would sheild her

From all the harm that was to occur.

She thought this was protection 

Not letting anyone give her affection.

She thought this would save her from heart ache 

But no one gave her a break.

She lived by the saying that went something like this 

‘The best way to not get your heart broken is to pretend like you don’t have one.’

.

So she lived her life acting like she didn’t have a heart, 

In most cases, she convinced herself that this indeed worked. Thinking she played it smart. 

She pretended that she didn’t have feelings, 

Convinced that this would stop the bleeding.

Then one day, she started to take her religion seriously, 

The religion of peace which people wonder about so curiously. 

She realised that to be in this completely,

She would have to have a heart that was soft and gentle, not so discreetly.

Now she needed to be careful, and speak kindly to people,

Regardless of her frustration, she had to keep it peaceful. 

.

.

.

Her heart was ice cold

At least that’s she told. 

She believed that putting on that persona meant no more pain

And that pretending to be heartless would keep her sane.

At this point, she had been through so much already, 

She just wanted her life to be steady. 

So please stop asking her to let her guard down, 

Cause that’s what made her breakdown.

She will be sure to keep those walls up

Until she feels that she can trust you enough.

The most dreadful phone call

When I answered the phone, 

I don’t recall ever feeling more alone. 

My mother’s voice on the end, 

“Your dad just passed away” she said. 

I walked into my room, pacing in the dark. 

‘How could this be?’ to myself I asked.

It was like nothing I ever felt; empty and hollow. 

Why did this happen, I never felt so much sorrow. 

And then if things couldn’t get worse,

My younger siblings asked me what felt like the most dreaded question in the universe.

“Did dad die” they said

These words I will never forget. 

The look on their innocent face,  

From my mind I can never erase. 

So much pain, so much worry, 

I was told to lie to them “no don’t be stupid” I felt so sorry

For the pain that was about to come, 

Was only the beginning, especially for my mum.

After that day, the house was filled with family and friends, 

Promising that they would be there till the end.

I think that’s the thing that made me grow up so quickly 

Empty promises that were made insincerely. 

From a young age I knew, 

Life was not easy. Why? I had no clue

Was it because nobody kept their promise? 

Why couldn’t they just be honest? 

Don’t lie to a child,

They will always remember the betrayal that made them feel exiled

Cut off from the world, feeling hopeless and tired. 

I was thirteen when my life took a turn, 

That’s when I knew I had to be more firm.

To protect myself and my family, 

Everything happened so rapidly. 

But more distress was still to come.

Then the funeral arrived, how I felt so numb. 

Now you lay there dear father, 

I miss you more, every year it gets harder. 

May your grave be filled with light, 

I pray to God that we will reunite

In the best place off all, 

Created by God Himself, named Janat al Firdaws. 

-This is the vague but true story of what happened when I found out my father passed away. I don’t think I’ve shared it more than a few people before as its quite personal. But I’m kind of anonymous here, so it’s a good way to get things out of system. Thanks for reading đź’™

Prove them wrong 

They told her “you can’t do it on your own” 

“Watch me” she said, with a confident tone. 

She knew she had to prove them wrong, even if it meant they would no longer get along. 

So that’s what she did, she made the decision to move on and make a living. 

They stared and wondered how she did it with such precision. 

How could a once lost young girl pick herself up so neatly? 

Dust herself off and continue as if it was so easy? 

They were confused, “But how did she?” 

She said, “I told you, not to underestimate me”