Yeah I’ve had a few weird looks. People do a double take ‘is that her?’ ‘She covered her head?’ ‘Wow she looks different’ ‘I wonder why, lets not ask and just awkwardly look instead…’ At work, at Uni, wherever it may be. At times I do feel people glancing at me and it gets uncomfortable, but its funny how most of the time I feel more confident. I don’t think I’m better than people or better than the sister that doesn’t cover, cause that was me 15 days ago. Not cocky, but confident. Confident in the person that I am, confident at the fact that I’m being acknowledged for who I am rather than my ‘beauty’. Yeah people may argue that we aren’t defined by our physical beauty, but unfortunately we are. I hate to admit it, it is sad but it’s reality.
It feels good to be accepted and heard and I don’t need to flaunt my stuff for that. I thought I did, I used to love showing off what I had, but SubhanAllah as you get closer to Allah swt it annoys you that people look at you in that kind of way. Yes, it used to feel flattering that someone was ‘checking you out’ but as your deen strengthened, there was nothing liberating about it at all, in fact it felt quite derogatory.
Alhamdullilah, it’s been 2 weeks and I couldn’t be happier that I didn’t delay this any further.