“If you’re not going to wear the hijab properly then don’t wear it at all!”
Hold on. That’s a HUGE thing to say.
I overheard a conversation earlier about a lady who was saying just that. And that sisters should take off their hijab if they’re not going to wear it properly, and put it back on once they’re ready.
I understand a part of that, obviously we should wear it properly. But the above mindest does not work- especially with our youth today- and especially living in a western country.
I understand the origin of that thought 100%. I used to think the same way. But it’s not healthy, for you or me.
I’m not here to defend immodest dress.
However, here are some repercussions of portraying this mindset to the community.
– Immorality leads to further immorality. If we are telling sisters to take off their hijab for not wearing it correctly- and they take on that advice because of us.. Imagine that once they take it off, they stop praying, they may think “Oh, now I can go clubbing”, “Now I can hang out with so and so, and try xyz”. Imagine if one of us were the reason for this. And imagine that the person dies upon a disobedient lifestyle before they were ready to wear the hijab properly.
– This brings me to my next point. You can never feel 100% Ready. The shaytan will whisper to you day in day out. Unless you consciously shut that down and take action, it will not go away, or, rather it will not lessen. I’m yet to hear a hijab story of someone who felt completely ready and not scared or nervous when they decided to put on the hijab.
– Everyone is on a different level of iman. Their ‘half’ hijab may be more pleasing to Allah swt than our ‘full’ hijab. How? Their struggle to hold onto their hijab may be the greatest struggle they are going through, but they are not taking it off purely for the sake of Allah. And our arrogance and judgement may ruin our intentions and relationship with Allah swt.
– The idea of all or nothing, it doesn’t work. We should be constantly making improvements- furthering our knowledge and practices. We are all struggling in one way or another. Your dress code may be your struggle, yet mine may be envy- the only difference is yours can be physically seen- available for everyone to judge, and mine can’t.
– If you’re going to give advice, please do it out of love. Speak gently, and show your concern. You’re advising them because you want to be their neighbour in Jannah. There is no need to be harsh. Most of us know what we are doing wrong. Approaching a sister harshly is not going to do anyone any good. Again, it all comes down to different struggles. How about if she is a revert, or if she just put the hijab on a week ago- are you going to discourage that? It takes time, support and knowledge to eventually cover up more and more.
– At the end of the day, we all sin. Judging someone for sinning differently is not a trait we should have.
I don’t want to cause a debate or heated discussion, because let’s be honest, a lot of people have a lot to say on this topic. I just wanted to spark a thought, make excuses for your brothers and sisters in Islam. Their struggle today may be our struggle tomorrow. And let’s leave the judging to the Judge Himself swt.